I went to university with a woman-let’s call her Liv-who, some years after our university days had ended, I spotted walking up the street in the dead of winter wearing nothing but a pair of hotpants and a T-shirt emblazoned with the slogan “I AM NOT A TOKEN WOMAN.” Liv could never have been mistaken…
Tag: Thomas (and friends)
Decorating Piglet’s Room With Arty Apple
You might have heard that I recently moved house. I think everyone has heard about the Terribly Long House Move; the move that has taken half a year or more with all the hanging about waiting for this chain and that chain, and oh-my-God-isn’t-buying-a-house-the-longest-thing-ever. People I have never spoken to at work keep making enquiries…
Twenty Questions I Have Asked Myself Whilst Watching Kids’ TV
Children’s television. Not a day goes past when I don’t wonder whether I have ruined my beloved child for life by plonking him in front of In The Night Garden at ten weeks old in a futile attempt to persuade him that going to beddy-bye-byes before 11pm was a really good idea. Let’s just say…
#Single Mum Tips: How to Survive Being on a Train with a Toddler
Apologies in advance peeps, for I thought it was time I wrote a tips post. Yes, a tips post. The sort of tedious diatribe where someone sees fit to give you their pearls of wisdom on a subject that you probably know more about than they do. I have read some classics in my time:…
#Single Mum Reviews: Mathmos Lava Lamp
Many months ago, I embarked on the tedious process of buying a house. My stipulations were basic: The property needed to be in or around the Bristol area, and it needed to have more than one bedroom. The purpose of the latter was clear; Piglet and I had been roomies since his birth. There was…
An Interview With Sir Topham Hatt
We meet at the Reform Club, Sir Topham-flanked by Aryan-looking security guards in impeccable Air Force blue uniforms-enters with a flourish, raising his top hat and tossing his cane into the arms of a waiting flunky at the door. “I do hope you haven’t been waiting long,” he says with a wry smile as he…
Kids TV: Then and Now
A while back I happened to notice that the closing credits to CBeebies at 7pm as the time comes to say goodnight have changed. Suddenly, Topsy and Tim, Sarah and Duck and Chuggington have popped up, and are going to bed (or in Chuggington’s case, the train equivalent) alongside Rastamouse, the Clangers and those talking vegetables…
Piglet’s Birthday Party: A Review
OK, so I am not actually reviewing Piglet’s birthday, but rest assured that if I did, it would be a 10/10 from me. It felt as though Piglet had already been two years old for several months, since I have been telling people that he is “almost two” for ages. I have also been fretting…
Thomas and Foes: A Shakespearean Tragedy
Scene 1: the Isle of Sodor. Enter three of the Naughty Trucks. Truck 1: “When shall we three meet again. In thunder, lightning, or in rain?” Truck 2: “When the Fat Controller’s done. When the Isle of Sodor again is one.” Truck 3: “To the engine shed! There to meet with Thomas.” Scene 2: Maron…
The Twenty Stages of Getting a Toddler to Sleep
When you are 20 months old and a tiny tyrant, there comes a point in every day, sometime after the closing bars of the CBeebies Goodnight song, when the time has quite literally come to say goodnight, to say sleep tight until the morning light. That time rarely comes until at least an hour and…