The Utter Trauma of Taking the Tree Down

Apparently, the Queen leaves her Christmas tree up until February. And I know this because I recently binge watched three royal-themed documentaries back to back on Channel 5.  Why watch The Crown on Netflix when you can have the real deal on Freeview complete with soundbites from a couple of the Daily Mail’s finest royal…

Ten Ways to Survive Twixtmas

It was the day before Twixtmas, and all through the house….. Oh hang on, the day before Twixtmas is Christmas Day, and precisely nobody-except, I imagine, those who are profoundly lonely or whose family are a shower of b******s-spends Christmas Day ruminating on the joys of the next day.  After all, we’re all too busy…

Let The Christmas Panic Commence

It is 5.58am on Christmas Eve and I am awake.  Since I have no other reason to be so at this time, I can only conclude that the Christmas Panic is setting in.  The cold, clammy fear that the roast potatoes won’t be crispy enough, the vegetarian centrepiece won’t be showy enough, and the alcohol…

A Little “Me” Time

As Piglet grows older, I find myself with more time to spare.  Now that he is more interactive and easier to feed, placate and transport, all of a sudden he is less of a burden to those who would babysit, and my time-my “me” time, so to speak, at least when I am not at…

How To Shop, Christmas-Style

Before you read on, I should probably emphasise that the placement of that comma in the title is deliberate, lest you think this is going to be a piece about where to find the most blisteringly ironic Christmas jumpers on the high street or how to, in the words of Home and Garden magazine, “bring…

Motherhood, Christmas Cards and Tin Openers

Today I bought a new tin opener. For some unknown reason, neither of the two adults I spoke to today (my mother and brother.  I’m not including the man in the shop where I bought the tin opener, since the conversation consisted of “that will be six pounds please” and that was it.  I KNOW,…