Catching a Train with a Baby

It seems that it is becoming increasingly impossible to write this blog.  Piglet is either awake, in which case he is trying to grab the laptop and/or one of the many other things he is Not Allowed to Touch (TV remote, plug socket, anything that isn’t one of his toys or my collection of books…

These are my peeps

Sleep. If I went to bed Right Now, I might get the full eight hours, time spent waking up to soothe a fretful Piglet aside. But I am not going to go to sleep right now, because I am writing this.  And the glow of the computer screen is going to adjust my hormone levels,…

The Middle Way

And so another trip to the Baby Weighing Clinic draws to a close. A trip in which I received a literal pat on the back from the health visitor for maintaining Piglet’s centile, no less. And then a metaphorical slap on the wrist for admitting that I sometimes (OK, maybe every day) feed him Organix…

I appear to have accidentally told someone I hate being a parent.* I am going to Hell in a Handcart.

Sorry.  I just really wanted to use the phrase “going to hell in a handcart.”  It is surely the best thing anyone has ever said, ever.  I mean, THE IMAGES. Anyway, back to the point, I am talking about how, as a parent, you become endlessly obsessed with how good or otherwise a parent you…

Breastfeeding + Work = Nightmare

Well, it had to end sometime.  I am now back to work. This is not as hideous as it could be, but it is like, JOKES trying to pump milk at work.  So far I have combed all the staff toilets looking for plug sockets “just on the off-chance,” commandeered an office at lunchtime which…

More Unsolicited Advice from the Good People of Wembley

So I regale you with yet another tale of how when you have a baby, everyone considers it their God-given right to tell you how to parent. I had, as usual, carefully considered how Piglet and I were presenting ourselves to the world, in order to deflect any unwanted comments.  Piglet was wearing his snowsuit,…

Drowsy but Awake

Piglet is having a nap *KLAXON* The flip side of this is that I am now scared to move.  I am backed into a corner of my own bed, based on the advice that “babies should nap in the place where they usually go to sleep” which, for Piglet, would be my bed.  This also…

Haters Gonna Hate

Ladies and gentlemen, I have been well and truly JUDGED. And I say to thee, Ye Olde Judgey McJudgeys of Wembley, if you are thinking that someone has made a terrible parenting faux pas, unless it is quite clear that the parenting in question constitutes actual child abuse, please keep your thoughts to yourself. Yesterday…

Piglet Commences Destruction of Entire House

Piglet had his second settling in session with the childminder today.  This went well, right up until the point where we were on the way home and Piglet, who has never been one for eating and drinking anything other than breast milk, decided that he was now hungry.  Hungry enough to start licking the zip…

What is this nap time of which you speak?

I haven’t written on here recently as I have been spending most of my life wandering around Wembley in a dead-eyed haze, pushing a pram containing a wide-eyed and alert Piglet, who sits staring at me blankly as I plead with him to take a nap. He does actually need a nap.  He has all…