What’s it like to be a Single Mother by Choice?

The simple answer is, not much different to being any other mother. We all spam our Facebook feed with pictures of adorable newborns, food-covered weaning babies and exuberant toddlers.  We all tell tales of sleepless nights and bodies that are never the same again.  We all scan the parks and baby groups for the sight…

To Date or Not to Date?

That is the question. It’s a question that I have so far been answering with a resounding “no.”  The thought of going online and putting myself forward to be scrutinised by strangers, and not making the grade.  The thought of having to sit opposite someone and make small talk, thinking all the while about how…

Who Needs Conventionality?

It was all supposed to be so easy. Grow up, go to university, enjoy your youth for a few years, then settle down, buy a house, have the big wedding with the big white dress, the perfect photos, the perfect venue, the perfect gushing speeches, and then pop out a baby; then a second, between two and…

What do you do in your “Me Time”?

At the beginning of this week I found myself in the unprecedented position of having no less than two days to myself. That’s right, time to myself: Me Time.  No work, no childcare duties, no nothing.

I’ve Never Been In Love….And That’s OK

Tonight my brother and I watched a programme about Euro ’96.  We sat there, and I drank wine and he ate his nutritious dinner of turkey twizzlers and chips, or some such horror (I stole some of the chips.  I am not above such filth).  We sat there in the parental abode where we grew…

The Grass Is Always Greener

One of the main perks of being a working parent is the cherished opportunity to talk to other adults about things other than teething and infant sleeping patterns.  I call this “water cooler conversation.” This morning’s water cooler conversation, so called because it took place next to an actual water cooler-albeit one that is not…

The Up and Down Life of A Working Mother

In the toilets at work there is an unforgiving mirror. It is in this mirror that I see the cold, hard evidence that life is starting to take its toll. I sometimes use it to pull out that evidence-the grey hairs I seem to have suddenly acquired-when no one else is around. Being a working…

Why I Am Happy To Be A Single Mother

What do you think of when you hear the words “single mother”? A harassed, overworked and underpaid divorced woman trying to raise her kids with negligible support from her ex-partner? A young woman barely existing on welfare, shunned by society as a drain on resources? Or a contented and fulfilled professional woman? “I CHOOSE my…

Surviving Valentine’s Day as a Single Parent

It’s that time of year again. No, not the first day of the summer holidays.  Not my birthday. Not even my birthday prior to 2010, when I decided we were going to start working backwards from now on. It’s BLOODY VALENTINE’S DAY. You know the drill.  In the red corner (red is for hearts, innit)…

Things not to tell my younger self

I quite often see blog posts and articles with headings about what you wish you had told your younger self. They invariably talk about how you shouldn’t worry, and how it will all be all right in the end. But what if it isn’t all right in the end?  What if the thing you want…