When There Are No Words, There Are Always Dancing Penguins

It is 8.20pm, and Piglet is not asleep. Instead, he is breastfeeding.  We have returned home from a day out which ended with a two hour nap (for Piglet, not me), eaten dinner and watched the end of Happy Feet. Happy Feet is a nice story, although I am disappointed that the portion I watch…

Diary of a Bedtime

“You were sleeping through by his age!” My mother’s words, uttered at regular intervals since my son turned three months old, are reaching a fever pitch. My son is almost three.  He is still not “sleeping through.” OK, that is a slight lie.  He has slept through, at least once, but to do so on…

The Joy of Lazy Days

Half term.  That frenzied time when you have one week to catch up on all those little jobs; the niggling bits of life admin that have a tendency to creep up on you until they make up a to-do list longer than your arm.  Yet it’s also that one week when you have all the…

How To Make Christmas Decorations Out Of Pine Cones

“I will never write a How To post,” I say smugly, “at least not on something I’m not an expert on.” Only experts, in my view, should be the ones writing How To posts.  Specialists in their field, people who’ve spent a lifetime in their area of expertise and several years of serious postgraduate study engaged…

Fitting It All In

The yoga teacher is disappointed in us, I’m sure. Every week she asks us the same question.  Are we doing our yoga at home?  Just a fifteen minute practice in the mornings?  Hell, we can even do it in bed if we want to.  Yoga really is that flexible (if you’ll excuse the pun) and…

Will I Be Single Forever?

We’ve all googled that, right, as a joke? OK, maybe not even as a joke.  Google knows everything.  Dr Google, Professor Google, Lord and Lady Google; Fellow of the Royal Society of Googling.  Bring me your wisdom O omniscient sage of the interwebs, and predict my romantic future. I never got a satisfactory reply. My…

Bath, Book, Bed? I Should Be So Lucky

The evening routine is not something I have ever really got the hang of.  I am not a routine person.  Mornings are for rushing out of the door barely dressed and with a toddler still mewling at the outrage of being torn from the comforting catatonic vigil of back to back Paw Patrol and Fireman…

Five Things Toddlers Are Obsessed With

OK, so this post should really be titled, “Five things MY toddler is obsessed with,” as I have no other benchmark from which to make my ridiculous generalisations, but here goes. Sticks Really we are talking branches here.  Some would say entire trees.  Check this bad boy out. This is not a new phenomenon. Yes,…

How I Turned Blogging into an Incredibly Lucrative Career Without Knowing the Difference Between Your and You’re-And Now You Can Too!

You all know me.  It’s Me, the Blogging Guru.  I had a terrible time after my first child was born.  It was hard getting to grips with just being Mum as opposed to an Academy Award-nominated actress (Best Make Up, 1998), and I was struggling to cope. So I started blogging.  Let’s face it, life…

Head Lice: When Speciesism Is Definitely The Best Option

I like to think that I’m pretty good to animals.  I’m vegetarian, although not vegan (one word: CHEESE) and although I would never dream of being preachy about it (OK guys, I’m being preachy.  EVERYONE BECOME VEGETARIAN YOU FLESH EATING HEATHENS), I like to think I’m doing my bit for the environment, but I am no…