Feeling a bit starved of affection. Might Get Cat.

It is a fact well established that a woman not in possession of a husband must be in want of a baby.  Or at the very least a cat, so I was of course not surprised to see (on Twitter.  Not in the course of my own literary wanderings.  I prefer something a little more…

Having a Baby: What’s The Right Time?

Another day, another brief trawl through the news; another headline flashing a great big red warning light decrying the trend for women (note I said “women” and not “people” here, as if women alone are responsible for furthering the next generation of humans) to have children later, and admonishing us all for being hard-headed careerists/wanting…

Note to self: Stop reading parenting blogs (that aren’t this one, obvs.)

What is it about parenting that makes everyone go all Judgey McJudge? Well, not everyone, but more specifically, me. No, in fact, everyone.  Everyone does this. OK I admit I was quite judgemental beforehand, in a “well that outfit isn’t very suitable for work now, is it?” kind of way, but with motherhood this tendency seems to have…

Horrible Itchy Disease

Woman in the last days of pregnancy is not a pretty sight. I, for example, have just thrown up the sole thing I have eaten today-a fried egg sandwich-and after three hours sleep it’s all I can do to move off the sofa in order to search the cupboards for stray crisps.  That is, if…

Confusion: Too many choices….

Now I appreciate that this sounds like an odd thing to say, and also as if I m moaning (again) but sitting on this sofa really isn’t the pleasant and comfortable experience that DFS intended it to be. This of course is not the fault of the sofa, which is, under normal circumstances, very comfortable…

Introducing the world’s first Gu Chocolate Pot Baby

Well, the insemination process is complete. And if I get pregnant, I will be writing to the Daily Mail and proclaiming it a “miracle baby.” I’m sure the Daily Mail has lots to say about people importing sperm from abroad off the internet and using it to self-impregnate.  Hell, they could even illustrate their disgust…

“Yes, I am familiar with Epipens.”

And so it begins. Everything got off to a good start, i.e. despite everything seeming so easy in the clinic with the nurse explaining to me how to use the Gonal F pen and how she made it all look so simple, just like taking a lid off a felt tip pen and writing with…

Physical Illnesses: 0 (v.g.): Mental illnesses: Innumerable

Well I picked up my test results from the GP today and it appears that I do not have any of the following: HIVChlamydiaHepatitis BHepatitis C Result. I felt so smug at the fact that I am officially STD-free that I actually toyed with the idea of taking a vow of chastity to preserve this…