The Maternal Guilt Starts Here

Well actually it started three months ago, when the wee one was born.  And there is never a moment when you are truly safe.  There’s always something waiting round the corner that could be going wrong.  A case in point being the one illustrated below. On Friday I was happily bleating down the phone to…

Horrible Itchy Disease

Woman in the last days of pregnancy is not a pretty sight. I, for example, have just thrown up the sole thing I have eaten today-a fried egg sandwich-and after three hours sleep it’s all I can do to move off the sofa in order to search the cupboards for stray crisps.  That is, if…

Bloated Whale

Urgh.  Lounging on the sofa like a bloated whale.  And every now and again my belly goes all hard and pointy, and I am told that this may be a Braxton Hicks contraction.  I had thought it was just the baby moving around.  Still, hopefully this means that by the time I finally go into…

Revelation: Having a Hangover is Basically Just Being Really, Really Tired

So apparently I should be relaxing and not overdoing it now that I am pregnant. I also shouldn’t be crossing my legs, as one person usefully reminded me, as I may “crush the baby.” I now feel infinitely guilty about all the times I have crossed my legs. Also I must look massive, as at…

The Anti-Cravings

I have not written on here for ages. This is because a) I am too scared in case everything goes wrong andb) I have been very lazy (blame the pregnancy tiredness). Anyway, I am now 11 weeks and still running to the loo every five minutes to check that Blastocyst (who has by now hopefully…