Bridget Jones’ Baby

I have yet to see the new film, but I like to imagine that Bridget Jones’ baby is rollin’ something like this. At least they will be if they are anything like my, um, toddler. 10th September 2016 Weight: About a stone, apparently (Mummy says scales not entirely accurate as keep saying she is half…

Pushchairs vs wheelchairs: let the battle commence

It wasn’t so long ago that I read a news story about a disabled man who took a bus company to court after a passenger with a pushchair refused to move out of a designated disabled space on the bus. What a disgrace! I can recall thinking.  I would NEVER be so impudent as to claim…

Who is even allowed to use the birth centre?

Just returned from a quick excursion to the toilet to find Piglet slumped in his bouncy chair, hanging off the end.  Perhaps the time has come to start strapping him in (what’s that sound?  The sound of social services being called at the fact that I have so far failed to do this).  Either that…

My Thoughts on Baby Fashion, and Other Matters

Love maternity leave.  So far today I have been mostly doing online quizzes (“which wife of Henry VIII are you?” I got Katherine Howard.  I always get her, which I presume means I am dead and wandering around Hampton Court Palace at night, sans head). I also invented a drinking game to be played whilst…

The Public Badge of Good Motherhood

Argh.  I have inadvertently trained Piglet to gaze blankly at the television as if in a hypnotic trance. Unfortunately, this does not only happen during In the Night Garden.  This was not supposed to happen.  I was supposed to be an earth mother, all joss sticks and babywearing, giving birth blissfully  in a bathtub surrounded…