And just like that, Piglet is practically an adult. Well OK not quite, but put it this way. I NO LONGER HAVE A PUSHCHAIR. Ever since the cold day in January 2017 when we first moved into our new abode, the trusty Bugaboo has had its place in the porch, and now the porch stands…
Category: fun times in Wembers
Back Where I Belong
My brother once accused me of being like a salmon. I took it as a compliment, as one does. Back in the days before I was vegetarian (seventeen years ago, though it gives me palpitations at the thought of my ever-increasing antiquity) I used to enjoy the occasional smoked salmon, and with their leaping about…
What are my Goals?
Today I had to have the phrase “goals” explained to me. In case you were wondering, apparently there are now a whole host of expressions which include this word, which have absolutely nothing to do with football. I put a picture of Wembley Stadium on this post anyway. Good ol’ Wembers. A tenuous link to…
Can I interest anyone in a flat? Anyone?
Well the plan to “spend some quality time with Piglet” over half term appears to have fallen flat. Piglet is currently out with Granny, socialising with her friends as usual, while I do boring things like try to sell my flat and shell out dizzying sums of money for the privilege. In fact, much of…
Partying it Up In Wembers
I will miss Wembley. Where else, with the possible exception of One Direction’s house (do they all live in the same house? I sort of imagine they do, except the one who left, obvs.) can you walk out of your flat, take the baby for a walk and find yourself in the middle of a…
Piglet Vs. Literature: Part 2
Piglet seems to have developed a rather disturbing new habit. Several times this week I have caught him banging his head-apparently deliberately-on his cot or my bed. Upon consulting Dr Google about this distressing new hobby I have learned the following: Piglet has above average intelligence Head banging is totally normal Piglet must be autistic…
More Unsolicited Advice from the Good People of Wembley
So I regale you with yet another tale of how when you have a baby, everyone considers it their God-given right to tell you how to parent. I had, as usual, carefully considered how Piglet and I were presenting ourselves to the world, in order to deflect any unwanted comments. Piglet was wearing his snowsuit,…
Drowsy but Awake
Piglet is having a nap *KLAXON* The flip side of this is that I am now scared to move. I am backed into a corner of my own bed, based on the advice that “babies should nap in the place where they usually go to sleep” which, for Piglet, would be my bed. This also…
Haters Gonna Hate
Ladies and gentlemen, I have been well and truly JUDGED. And I say to thee, Ye Olde Judgey McJudgeys of Wembley, if you are thinking that someone has made a terrible parenting faux pas, unless it is quite clear that the parenting in question constitutes actual child abuse, please keep your thoughts to yourself. Yesterday…
Piglet Commences Destruction of Entire House
Piglet had his second settling in session with the childminder today. This went well, right up until the point where we were on the way home and Piglet, who has never been one for eating and drinking anything other than breast milk, decided that he was now hungry. Hungry enough to start licking the zip…