Woman in the last days of pregnancy is not a pretty sight. I, for example, have just thrown up the sole thing I have eaten today-a fried egg sandwich-and after three hours sleep it’s all I can do to move off the sofa in order to search the cupboards for stray crisps. That is, if…
Month: July 2014
GET THIS BABY OUT OF HERE!
Baby still not here and predictably I am going crazy checking the Internets every five minutes for flimsy “reassurance” (which is not very reassuring when sites about “stillbirth” come up). My mother is going frantic and worrying, and people are ringing up every five minutes asking if I’ve had the baby yet. Meanwhile every time…
Baby seems to be keeping me waiting…
No, baby has still not arrived, and I am officially “overdue.” Cue prophetic warblings from my mother about how I am going to take after her and be ten days late, and mass hysteria on Netmums as I trawl through other people’s appallingly written posts about how they have tried everything and baby still hasn’t…
Hurry Up Or I’m Going To Lose the Sweepstake
No the baby has still not emerged. And tomorrow is 15th July, which is the date I predicted in the Baby Shower Sweepstake (no financial prizes, just the joy of winning), so it looks like I am going to have to take some drastic action to make the baby be born by the end of…
Baby Still Not Here. I Feel Sick. Probably Because it’s my Birthday
Summary of my day so far: Got up, realised it was my birthday, threw up, returned to bed. That pretty much says it all. Thirty-four just has such a great ring to it. Just exactly what last night’s mushroom omelette and chips were still doing in my system ten hours after they were eaten is…
Missing Work Already….
I’m writing this on my mother’s home computer. This means two things: 1.) I may be discovered and 2.) I’m not sure if that is good or bad. I mean, it’s not like anyone reads this blog due to the extreme veil of secrecy surrounding it. Oh well. Today is my first official day of…
Not a very yummy mummy….
Well I don’t mean to sound ungrateful but I have to admit I am feeling less than enamoured with my physical appearance at the moment. Today I actually discovered that I have fat feet. Fat feet! Perish the thought! Cue visions of obese people squeezing their bloated plates of meat into too-tight ballet pumps, flesh…