Parody of a Mummy Blogger

Today is my blog birthday.

Yes peeps, today my blog is a whole two weeks old!

I KNOW.  I can’t believe it either.  TWO WEEKS!

In celebration of this momentous event, the lovely people at MyBloggingTips.com have asked me to write a very special Two Things I Have Learned in Two Weeks.  I am, like, SO EXCITED.  I know all you lovely people can’t wait to hear all my words of wisdom; how I’ve created my own little space here on the World Wide Webs, worked with some amazing brands, and found inner peace after a traumatic nail break six days ago.  So here goes.

1.) Write some stuff.

I KNOW.  I wish I had thought of that too!  Apparently that’s what blogging is about, writing stuff! WHO KNEW?  Since I first put pen to paper-oops, I mean fingertips to keyboard (lucky I had those false nails from GoNailMe removed after the nail break.  Only £25 for shellac nails, all in a variety of gorgeous and unique designs!) two weeks ago, I have been literally blown away by all the love out there.  The other day I had a post featured on Mumsnet.  You know, the one about the refugee children #hotoncurrentaffairs #compassion #RefugeesArePeopleToo, and I had sixteen likes on Facebook, raising awareness of the Save Syria’s Cats Campaign.  People, our words are powerful!

2.) Set up a website.

I literally couldn’t believe how easy this was!  At least, it was easy once the good people from WebHostingServices4U.com had talked me through it.  Apparently, you just buy a domain name (only £600 per annum at WebHostingServices4U.com!) and then set up a WordPress account.  Next thing you know, you’ve broken the internet with your recipe for Baby Mia’s First Foods Mashed Courgetti with Celery Sticks (only £4 per jar from the Baby Mia’s First Foods range at Asda).

As if this weren’t exciting enough, over the next few days I will be premiering my brand new ebook: Blogtastic!  What I’ve Learned From Two Weeks of Blogging, which will be available as an exclusive download from Amazon.com, and I have an exciting brand collaboration coming up with Little Noses Baby Muslins, who are taking a very special series of photographs to commemorate the four hundred Instagram likes I got for my picture of little D blowing her nose in a field of tulips.  She was wearing the most ADORABLE baby dungarees from Dotty Dora’s Baby Boutique.  I can’t wait to see how the pictures turn out!

The other day I was asked by the lovely people over at the Blogging Newbies Support Group to give my advice for any aspiring would-be bloggers out there.  I told them that the most important thing is to Find Your Unique Voice.  Do you love baby haircare products?  Or do you prefer taking photos of yourself face down in a bucket of gin on a Saturday night after having to look after the kids while hubby pops out to the shops?  Whatever you love, blog about it!

After that, I would say network in the blogging community.  There’s a whole world of love out there if you just go looking for it.  In the past two weeks, I’ve made some friends for life.  We’ve bonded over broken links, drank wine over Whatsapp and eaten cake together via Skype, and it’s been emotional.  I’ve nominated twenty-six people for the Blogarama Blogging Oscars in the past two days and I’ve still got another four hundred posts to read and comment on this week alone!  Hubby has forgotten who I am and is threatening to run off with the au pair!

Speaking of the au pair, yesterday was her afternoon off and I had to look after Little D for TWO HOURS!  I explained to hubby that there was no way I could keep up with all my linkies #funnymummies #reviewposts #toomanycomments but he had to go to work or something.  I’ve got a post in drafts about it! #Trauma

Anyway, finally I would like to say a big thank you to #BloggingCakes for my lovely blog birthday cake, which they made gluten and sugar free especially for me!

You can also catch me on Pinterest, Instagram, Twitter, Google Plus, Snapchat, Tumblr, Facebook, Periscope and Grindr.  Also, don’t forget my latest vlog: What’s In My Changing Bag? over on Youtube.  Here’s to another two weeks, people!  #Happy #Blessed.

I received my domain name from Deep Blue Domains for the reduced price of £450, in return for this post.  The blogging cake was given to me free in return for an honest review.  All opinions are my own.  I wasn’t paid for the Amazon.com reference.  Facebook haven’t yet responded to my tweet offering free advertising.

Also, if Coco Chanel is reading this, I LOVE your handbags.  The perfect match with any outfit.

My Kid Doesn't Poop Rainbows


Petite Pudding
ethannevelyn

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Life Love and Dirty Dishes

79 Comments Add yours

  1. Haha, a fun read. Loved it!
    #FartGlitter

    1. Min says:

      Thank you-glad you liked it. Thanks for commenting!

  2. Hahaha, a fun read. Loved it!
    #FartGlitter

    1. Min says:

      Thanks for commenting!

  3. This really had me snorting out loud, and cringing a little bit as I might have been guilty of a few of these over-excited announcements at various points in my teeny tiny blogging stint so far. (I do remember writing how thrilled I was when I hit 100 followers on twitter – but then to be fair my personal twitter account has a grand total of 9 and most if them are eggs!) Thanks for the giggle and thanks for linking up with #FartGlitter. Loved it! x

    1. Min says:

      Glad you liked it. I think we are all guilty of a few of these, myself included. I definitely recognise the “writing about serious stuff just to get on Mumsnet” thing in me!

  4. Congrats!! Excellent tips!

    1. Min says:

      Haha! After 2 weeks, I am an internationally recognised expert!

  5. Wow. Cringing and laughing in equal measure but YOU HAVE NAILED IT (mine are currently bitten to the quick and no falsie brand can save them). Very, very funny and clever. #fartglitter

    1. Min says:

      Thanks. I just hope everyone sees the funny side and I am not now banished from the blogging community for eternity!

  6. Gretel says:

    This is genius. Thank you for the laugh out loud factor! #chucklemums

  7. MMT says:

    Oh the Shame 😉 I definitely recognise some parallels between this parody and my own blog whoops! It’s enough to make me want to go back and delete a couple of posts ha ha!
    V funny Min 😉

    1. Min says:

      Don’t delete anything! Most of this stuff I have totally been guilty of too. In fact the Mumsnet thing is a parody of me, as I have actually written posts with the INTENTION of being featured on Mumsnet. Sometimes I just have to take a step back and think, hang on a minute, what am I doing? I’m part of this bizarre world that no one outside it actually understands! Glad you liked it.

  8. Beta Mummy says:

    Ha ha brilliant! You have written the post I wasnt brave enough to write! 😉
    So funny, love it.

    1. Min says:

      Thanks! Glad you liked it (and relieved I haven’t offended people-at least not that they’ve told me!)

  9. Hahahaha what about ‘I set up my own linky!’ 😉
    Nailed it.
    I wish I’d written this first.

    Fran #chucklemums

    1. Min says:

      I knew there was something I’d forgotten! Surprising as I feel as though I’m literally drowning in a sea of linkies at the moment. Glad you liked it!

  10. sarah says:

    hahahaha, amazing!! I can think of a couple ike this for real!!! #chucklemums

    1. Min says:

      I make no comment. Got to protect my sources!

    1. Min says:

      Haha, thanks!

  11. Baby Anon says:

    Ha ha ha.This made me laugh. Thanks for pointing out that bloggers need to write. I keep forgetting to do that…#puddinglove

    1. Min says:

      I think quite a lot do…! Including me at the moment-too many linkies, not enough time! Glad you liked it.

  12. Tam says:

    Ha ha! Thought this was so funny and totally relatable! I’m brand new to blogging and just discovering this crazy world of linkies! Loved it!

    1. Min says:

      Thanks! Glad you liked it.

  13. Katie Taylor says:

    wonderful!! congrats on your 2 weeks bloggerversary passing some fizz your way x #puddinglove

    1. Min says:

      Haha, I might drink fizz every 2 weeks!

  14. Very good – I have to admit to a few of these, I was ridiculously over excited at getting 100 followers on twitter and often try to explain to my other half that I have to do this linky or that comment! He thinks I am a nutter, think I will send him to this blog post ha ha. Thanks for linking up #PuddingLove

    1. Min says:

      If you’re not in the whole blogging bubble, it must seem very odd to those on the outside looking in. My mum is the same!

  15. Haha this is brilliant! I’m definitely guilty of a few of these, as a bit of a newbie but was snorting away with laughter – such a great read! X

    1. Min says:

      Oh, I think we’re all guilty of some of these, me included! Sometimes I just have to take a step back from it all and get a bit of perspective! Glad you liked it, and thanks for commenting.

  16. Hilarious and so, so accurate! Love it. You are great Min, I really enjoy all your posts. Sarah #FabFridayPost

    1. Min says:

      Aw, thank you, that’s a lovely thing to say!

  17. Hehehe, love it! Funny. Screamingly funny. It would be even funnier, but, you know what…? Some blogs are *actually* like this! ???

    1. Min says:

      I know! Hopefully not mine (er…)

  18. Emma says:

    OH MY GOODNESS!!!! I am howling with laughter. BRILLIANT. I am off to take a picture of myself in a bath gin sponsored by #hendricksgin #ilovegin but all (slightly drunken) words are my own 😉 #Fabfridaypost

    1. Min says:

      I think you deserve your bath of #hendricksgin given the news you’ve had today! Why not make it #cristalchampagne, I say. Is Cristal Champagne still a thing, or am I still marooned on a yacht in the early 2000s with J-Lo, P Diddy and Donatella Versace?

  19. Emma says:

    bath of gin that should have read! I am not in it yet – promise!

  20. Ellen says:

    Ahahaha!! It’s so true that it all gets a bit ridiculous at times. My husband is baffled when I’m like ‘just give me half an hour to do my linky commenting’. It’s easy to get wrapped up in it but it’s really a very small part of the world haha.

    1. Min says:

      My mum is the same. We were eating dinner this evening and I was so close to starting a conversation about the BiBs, on quite a few occasions, and I had to stop myself, knowing that she would immediately pour scorn on any kind of pathetic self-pity party I entered into about not being shortlisted!

  21. Yep this sounds all a bit familiar. Gets a bit repetitive doesn’t it! #FabFridayPosts

    1. Min says:

      It does! Thanks for commenting.

  22. Brilliant post! I think I’m guilty of a fair few too ooops, but what a fun read 🙂 x thanks for hosting #fabfridaypost

    1. Min says:

      Thanks for commenting!

  23. Philippa says:

    Yep, agree with all of the above. Well done for calling us all out!

    1. Min says:

      Haha, I hope it wasn’t too traumatic for everyone to read. I know I’m just as guilty of some of these as anyone else!

  24. Hahahaha! Genius. In all seriousness though…you’ve accomplished a lot in 2 weeks!! We’re well jell #bloggerenvy 😉 #fabfridaypost

    1. Min says:

      I have sadly accomplished very little considering I started writing this blog in January 2013. It was a private blog for most of that time, and I didn’t even know parent blogs were a thing until I went public last summer. I’ve got massive #bloggerenvy of those people who pop up and a week or so later are being hailed as the next big thing!

  25. Pahaha – just perfect! I read this over on your blog earlier in the week but had to come back to read it again – the funniest thing is this could totally be a blog post!!! #FabFridayPost

    1. Min says:

      I know-hopefully no one took it too seriously. I have been congratulated on my two week blogaversary but I’m going to assume that was meant in jest!

  26. What a great and fun read!
    #FabFridayPost

  27. This is so funny – I am literally ‘like’ crying whilst tapping my OPI nails over the keys – you are so funny! Seriously, though, just brilliant! #fortheloveofBLOG (would love to know what inspired you to write this!!)

    1. Min says:

      Haha, I have to protect my sources! Actually the truth is it just popped into my head when I was on the train on the way to work. I was reading a post by a well-known blogger at the time, but the post I ended up writing was entirely fictional, although inspired by a number of different people, including myself, as I have definitely been guilty of some of these!

  28. Love, love, love this! Incessantly giggling over here. Also, thank you for the reminder that I may want to pop a fresh coat of polish on my sad chipped fingernails. #justanotherlinky

    1. Min says:

      Oh don’t worry about the fingernails-mine can’t remember the last time they saw paint! Glad you liked the post and thank you for commenting.

  29. Mrs Tubbs says:

    Been there. Posted that. Extracted head from own arse afterwards and wondered just what have I become!!!! So funny. Saved it for when I need a reality check. And for occasional games of blogger bingo to see how many of these I can tick off on someone’s post. Because … er …

    1. Min says:

      Haha, yes indeed. Blogger bingo sounds like a good idea, and I have been guilty of some of these myself, too!

  30. LOL! Blogarama Blogging Oscars!! Wow! Who ever thought of that! Only You Min! lol! Ridiculously funny! 🙂 xx Thank you so much for co-hosting with me. #FabFridayPost

    1. Min says:

      Thank you!

  31. The Pramshed says:

    Ha Ha Min! So funny! I’m sure that I am guilty of a few of these parodies, having only been blogging for 3 months plus, I’m quite proud of my achievements, but it’s nice to have a little laugh at yourself and what you’ve become from blogging 😉 Love the nails too, and the cake reference! Thanks for making me giggle after a bad time with a teething bubba, and thanks for joining us at #fortheloveofBLOG, we hope you come back to join the party next week. Claire x

    1. Min says:

      Thanks for hosting and commenting! Glad you liked it.

  32. ShoeboxofM says:

    I’m sure I’ve read posts exactly like that. Too close to the truth. I applaud you!

    #justanotherlinky
    #fortheloveofblog

    1. Min says:

      Me too! You have to laugh. I’m guilty of one or two of these myself. Thanks for commenting.

  33. Haha this is brilliant – I’m guilty of some of these. Thanks for linking up to #justanotherlinky xx

    1. Min says:

      I think we all are-I know I definitely am!

  34. Absolutely hilarious! Thanks for the laugh – you are so spot on! (#wishwe’dwrittenit) ?

  35. Emma says:

    Oh I still love this post, although I find myself cringing and laughing as I read it! Eeeks! I need that ebook blogtastic though 😉 Thanks for linkng up with #FridayFrolics

    1. Min says:

      Haha, I’ll have to write that ebook! Thanks for hosting and commenting.

  36. Standing ovation. Loved this. So Funny. Thanks for linking up to #FridayFrolics

    1. Min says:

      Glad you liked it. Thanks for hosting and commenting!

  37. Silly Mummy says:

    Haha – I love this! It’s scarily accurate! 😀

    Thank you so much for joining us on #FridayFrolics. Hope to see you next time.

    1. Min says:

      Thanks for hosting and commenting!

  38. so frickin hilarious, I have just started so YAY me should I do a what I have learned in 2 hours of blogging? lol. Love this take the piss kind of post

    1. Min says:

      Thanks-glad you liked it. And yes, definitely tell everyone what you’ve learned in 2 hours!

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